Day 4 rejection train straight ahead.

So another shitty ass train crash day down only about 4 million more to go. Good noted "S" go released and is able to see the kids. They are ecstatic and I'm sure he is too. Bad news yesterday was a day full "sorry dont want ya chicky" for me. Topped off with my phone call with S at 1am on the way home from jail. But u know what its fucking fine, seriously I'm tired of being the one who tries and builds up the other person Where the fuck is that for me. I'm not chasing and begging anyone to be with me. If they want me great they will show it. If not fine fuck u too. I deserve a hell of alot better than what I allow myself to be okay with. I may not be skinniest, or prettiest but I am kind, caring, loyal to a fault and love with my whole heart. So if he wants to try and work it out I'm game but only if I get what I give out back. And if he doesn't and has moved on. Fuck it. I'm not begging I'm nobody's pity fuck.